Strolling along the bay today I am not assaulted by the usual suspects of speeding bikes or wound up runners, but by the seemingly never ending stream of inspirational slogans randomly strewn across people’s bodies.
‘Never Give Up’ is donned over a profusely sweaty red-faced mover – a generic label given to not quite a jogger or even a walker, more like a dragger – that needs to give up instantly otherwise risking heart attack…or at least exhaustion.
‘You are the Star of Your Own Movie’ sadly highlights the wearer’s lack of star qualities and that somewhere, somehow the casting went all wrong. Though, movies of course can be variable in genre and quality.
‘Prove Them Wrong’ is probably- whoever they are- proving them right!
‘Break All the Rules’ is pathetically subscribing to the rules of all bay runners – do the bay every Sunday morning, don’t worry if it’s 40 degrees or if its pissing down, or if you would really prefer to be at home sipping on a cappuccino or puffing on a cigarette. Even if you hate walking or running or if it makes you feel like complete crap, you know, ‘Just Do It’! Then you’ll feel great! Really!
I lower my eyes trying to shield them from anymore demotivating inspirational aphorisms and alas one has dropped to the pavement. Some Lorna Jane look-alike has stencilled ‘All You Have is Now’ in blue cursive onto the cement. I imagine this little pearl of wisdom has slid off a sweaty singlet to its rightful position just so it can be trod over and destroyed by those of us who want to take vengeance on all these little lying lines forcing their way onto our chests and into our minds.
Sunday church doctrine is looking much more appealing these days.