Despite constant attempts to silence him, Righteous Rightie vows to keep speaking truth to ‘oppressed group’ power
Dear RR – I yearn for the old Australia, the one where a man could down 10 schooners and start mouthing off about inscrutable ching chongs, mental gingers, drunken Micks, fanatical camel jockeys, war-crazy Krauts, sheep-shagging Kiwis, soap-dodging Poms and hairy-arsed feminazis without being subjected to a career-destroying show trial and forced to undergo sensitivity training at the hands of some hatchet-faced tribade academic. Wasn’t the world a happier place back in the days when you could joke with your barber about his woggish taste in food, fashion and motor vehicles without him bursting into operatic tears and running off to the Human Rights Commission to complain (in hilariously accented English!) about racism? Can the likes of you, Bernardi, Leyonhjelm and Hanson ever restore that lost paradise?
LL replies: Who’d be a prominent middle-aged white man with a career in the law, journalism, politics or business nowadays, eh Brendan?! What do we get for our outsized social contributions other than a prickly attitude from the Hindu at the convenience store, rape accusations from any female Social Justice Warrior we so much as make eye contact with, and having to listen to the Prime Minister of this once great nation yabber on in some ooga-booga Aboriginal language at the opening of Parliament? No special snowflake treatment for us, old boy, nor any recourse if we’re called a blue-eyed devil, farang, gwai loh, skip, moon cricket, paleface, round-eye, Vanilla Ice or whitey. Granted, I’ve never been called any of those things but if I was you wouldn’t catch me being offended or insulted. I’ve never experienced it myself but I’m sure racist abuse is invigorating and character-building for all parties involved. Free speech may seem a lost cause but rest assure I’ll continue to champion your right mock people on the grounds of their race, religion and sexuality.