Inner West Whispers – 242

Haberfield goes all night, Inner West women rule and a Babysit-in

• Haberfield residents were kept up well past midnight last week due to a certain NRMA ad being filmed near Crescent Street. We recommend recompense in the form of ‘hush’ money and a bottle of Grange vintage to suck on before bed.

• In a rather brash move for the comparatively reserved Italian Prime Minister, Matteo Renzi has demanded the immediate cession of Enmore Rd to the Italian Republic. Cow and Moon will not be receiving any prize money for their gelato win until this transfer has occurred. All visitors to the establishment should be prepared to queue and show their papers upon arrival.

• A temporary after-school care facility has been set up in NSW Education Minister Adrian Piccoli’s office to protest the lack of care facilities in the Inner West. It is predicted the children will be served an assortment of stale biscuits for afternoon tea, to accompany one rather large stalemate.

• Leichhardt Council issued a press release calling Telegraph journalist, Tim Blair’s attack on their workplace diversity program “small minded and pathetic”. Leichhardt is fast becoming one of the least ethnically diverse suburbs in Sydney, so their commitment to opening a work experience position for a refugee resident is an important one. We just hope it’s paid.

• As residents will already be aware the Inner West has a disproportionate representation of fun and fearless females compared to the rest of Australia. Now Cosmopolitan’s new-age talent pageant has confirmed it. Two Inner West residents have been nominated to win the title of Cosmo’s most Fun and Fearless Female Award, including Puberty Blues actress and Marrickville darling Brenna Harding. Is she fun enough? Is she fearless enough? The real questions is how much forced alliteration and empowerment can talented Aussie women stand?

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